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Flourish-Meant: You Were Meant to Live Abundantly

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Dec 10, 2021

Have you ever wanted to make yourself (or your spouse) disappear during an argument in your marriage? Do you struggle with conflict or distance in your relationship? What does it take to create magic in a marriage?

Illusionist and Pastor Danny Ray joins us to share secrets of how to create a magical marriage. Along with his wife, he examined how the principles of magic performances overlap with Biblical insights on how to improve our relationships.

We discuss the myths and mentalism tools related to mind-reading. In my counseling practice, couples often came to my office believing they had mind-reading powers. They suspected one another of negative attitudes, thoughts, and intentions. Instead of having conversations to clarify their true feelings and open ways to meet needs, their self-guarding, negative assumptions built walls.

Danny Ray notes how the mentalist practices of looking for clues about yourself could instead be used by spouses to serve one another in love. He offers the example of noting what your spouse enjoys and how they feel in order to bless them.

We discuss the key principle of seeking the best in one another in loving and merciful attitudes. Discovering clues about your spouse could lead you to serve them in ways that create awe and wonder in your relationship.  

Danny mentions the principle of misdirection in performing illusions and emphasizes the importance of focusing on the right things in your marriage. 

Creating a Magical Marriage cites 6 principles to improve communication and relationships. Danny Ray and his wife also relate how to overcome loss and crisis when it could otherwise prove devastating to your marriage.

We discuss the critical nature of planning your life together so you begin with a result in mind. Every step leads in a specific direction and determines where you end up. We discuss how scheduled and improvised performances depend upon practice and planning. 

Danny and I also discuss the importance of paying attention to your spouse. Set aside distractions and focus on the other person's heart. Paying attention serves as a rewarding investment in your relationships.

Danny Ray emphasizes the critical nature of forgiveness and grace. He quotes Ephesians 4:32 and Proverbs 19:11. Since the Bible calls us to forgive as Christ forgave us, we benefit most by choosing to forgive before an offense occurs. Danny shares his personal story of strengthening forgiveness as a muscle.

We explore the issue of always and never statements, noting how exaggeration distorts partial truths into destructive lies.

Danny encourages spouses not to see one another as enemies. Instead, consider your partner as one who fights battles back to back with you against the opposition. Marriage never allows one spouse to win when the other loses. If one spouse loses, you both lose.

Danny also notes the devastation pornography causes to marriage. He shares how secrets create division in marriage and prevent each spouse from fulfilling their identity as intended by God. 

We discuss the powerful support counseling, mentoring, and fellowship can provide to heal and strengthen marriages.

Danny Ray emphasizes the importance of choosing to do what it takes each day to create a great marriage.

Don't miss Danny Ray's December 2,2021 appearance on the Pen and Teller Fool Us show! Watch the replay and other performances on Danny Ray's YouTube Channel. Connect with Danny Ray for all of his resources, including his new book, No, I Can't Make Your Wife Disappear, at

If marriage or any other aspect of your life triggers stress and anxiety, check out my courses on Subdue Stress and Anxiety or Your Stress-Less and Joy-Blessed Holiday Season!